August – Same Old Story
I can’t help feeling as if I’ve made very little progress in my life since my last birthday. I should really give myself a little slack, since the past 22 months have been some of the most difficult of my life, but at some point I just wonder if I’m only making excuses for myself. At what point does it stop being “things are rough for you right now” and start being “you’re not really trying”?
Sigh. I dunno. Last year around this time, I started making serious efforts to think about my future and work on having a backup plan to support myself. I tried my hardest, but nothing came of it, and I can’t see those efforts as anything but failures. I don’t know what I’m doing with my life now, other than doing everything I can to get through the rest of the year.
Self-indulgence has helped. I celebrated my birthday in part by doing as much stuff just for me as I could… eating junk food, rewatching some of my favorite comedies with my friends, those sorts of things. And now that my birthday has come and gone… well, I hope to finally get back to my writing and photography projects, at least. Only time will tell how I actually do with that.
-BHS
2 Comments (+add yours?)