BHS Blogress Report: 2019, Week 38 – Out of Place

Week 38 – Out of Place
Mom’s surgery went well. Better than I thought, actually, as she’s up and been able to get up and walk around freely for the past few days… I was fearing that she might be bedridden. Thank you guys for all your thoughts and well-wishes, they really helped out.
I really wish I didn’t feel so damned awkward all the time. It’s my long history of social anxiety at work, sure, but there’s no reason why I should feel unwelcome even among other anime fans. No matter where I go or who I interact with, there’s a little voice in my head that whispers “You don’t belong here.” Hell, even when I talk to my best friend, I have to constantly tell myself that I’m not being annoying and that what I have to say really is of interest.
The sad fact is that I’ve built up a lot of self-hatred over the years, it influences my ability to communicate with people, and I don’t really have many effective ways to deal with it. My brain is often my worst enemy.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: BHS Belated Blogress Report: 2019, Week 37 – On Hold Due to IRL | Tasakeru
  2. Trackback: BHS Blogress Report: 2019, Weeks 39 and 40 – Low on Content | Tasakeru

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