BHS Blogress Report: 2018, Week 42 – They’re Scrapped Ideas for a Reason

Week 42 – They’re Scrapped Ideas for a Reason
Shattered Skies turned four yesterday. For something that started partly as a self-imposed challenge, I think it’s turned out remarkably coherent, don’t you? I hope you all enjoyed the pic I made to celebrate, linked below:
I experimented a bit with the lighting effects this time around, and I really like how it turned out.
So, as additional bonus content for the fourth anniversary of my passion project, I thought I’d share a few concepts from the story that got changed or left on the cutting room floor. For some of them, it should be obvious why I edited or scrapped them… for others, maybe not so much.
Please be advised, these will be *SPOILERS* for those of you who aren’t yet caught up with the recent chapters.
In chronological order:
  • Joker was going to appear in person in all five Vertices during the Invasion arc. I scaled this back because I thought doing so would dilute his presence and potentially make people tired of him too early.
  • The merged Moebius-Pharaoh 90 entity was going to essentially turn Carnaaji into a planet-sized fortress for Dead End, as a staging ground to attack the TSAB. I couldn’t figure out how to make it work, and I felt the heroes needed to foil at least one of Joker’s many plots during the Invasion chapters… so I had the Arc-en-Ciel successfully destroy Moebius 90, but not Unison!Will.
  • The Princess Precure weren’t going to be in the story at all. When I started it in 2014, I fully intended to have Happiness Charge be the cutoff point, and both Cure Fortune and Cure Princess were going to make it to the Lighthouse. This was partly because I was convinced that Go! Princess would be an off year. By the time I actually got to writing the Precureverse Invasion chapters, though,GoPrin had become one of my all-time favorite Precure series, and I decided I had to include the team. Because of that, poor Hime got left behind…
  • I also considered sparing one of the Fresh Cures, which at various times was going to be Peach, Pine, or Passion. Then I considered that Passion reverting back into Eas had a ton of potential, and, well…
  • Artemis was going to die in the Sailorverse Invasion arc, when the Senshi were trapped inside the merged Labyrinth. He was going to be hit by one of the Familiars of Gisela, the motorcycle Witch, and die in Sailor Venus’s arms. That was going to be the reason she snapped and attacked Joker with the Holy Sword. I scrapped this one because there were way too many important things happening in those chapters. The death of such an important member of the Sailor Moon supporting cast just couldn’t be given proper weight with everything else I had to work in. This was a last-minute decision; I was in the process of writing the scene in Gisela’s part of the Labyrinth when I changed my mind.
  • It took forever to decide which Senshi would make it to the Lighthouse. Usagi was always a given, as were Chibi-Usa and Hotaru, but at one time or another nearly all the others were being considered as casualties. The final decision came down to which characters I thought would make for the most interesting interactions going forward. The ones captured and converted by Dead End were largely chosen because having them on the side of the Lights would given them too much of an advantage… Ami in particular, being a super-genius doctor and all.
  • On a related note, either Mami or Kyoko was going to escape from Vertex Five along with Madoka and Homura… until I realized that the only way to keep Homura’s actions secret was to be sure she and Madoka escaped alone.
  • Chapter 21 was going to be merged into what became Chapter 22, then it was going to be scrapped altogether, then I changed my mind. The real-life stuff happening that week convinced me that it absolutely had to be a standalone chapter. It’s loosely based on a conversation between myself and :devVDrake: that happened the night before I posted it. He didn’t slap me, but he did give me a much-needed talking-to very similar to the one Erika gave Tsubomi.
  • Yayoi and Yui’s relationship was written in almost entirely out of spite. I know how horrible that sounds, but bear with me: a friend of mine was writing his own Smile/GoPrin crossover in which Yayoi and Yui got together, and I couldn’t believe how perfectly they fit together, or that I hadn’t thought of it first. That story was then rewritten to remove Yayoi entirely, in favor of giving Yui Precure powers… I was so enraged at the loss of my YaYui adorableness that I vowed to write it into my story instead. Make of that what you will.
  • The name “Operation Batman” was VDrake’s idea. He suggested it as a joke. As with quite a lot of the ideas that we toss back and forth, I thought it was good/bad enough to use for real.
  • I always planned to have a nightmare fuel orifice invasion scene with Jamanen (a shoutout to a notorious scene from Batman Beyond), but it wasn’t always going to end with someone being Jellaxified. My original plan was to have Jamanen attempt to possess the unfortunate victim from inside… and said victim would regain control long enough to beg Cure Black to “punch me in the stomach… as hard as you can!” That would, ahem, cause Jamanen to be expelled from her victim in a spectacularly disgusting fashion. I went back and forth on that one before deciding that it would raise the stakes much higher to have one of the rescue team be assimilated successfully.
  • Part of the Jamais Ville sequence were written with the help of Forzare, my Stars Above co-author. They’ve always had a flair for surreal horror.
  • Chibi-Usa was going to have a scene in Jamais Ville where she turned a corner and temporarily ended up back in Tokyo in Vertex One, right in front of the jewelry store. She would then see a little of what had happened since the Senshi all left Earth. As with the earlier example in the Labyrinth, I thought there was too much going on already to do that scene justice, so I cut it. I actually have about two pages of that scene written, so I might reuse it in some form.
  • When the post-GoPrin Precure continuities are attacked by “the entity”, the original plan was to have it appear at the precise moment in each series where the main character first encounters the supernatural, thus ending their stories before they began. Up to the point where I was halfway through writing Ichika’s scene in the KKPCALM-verse, my intention was to insert “the entity” into the Hugtto-verse at the moment in the first episode when Hana’s about to get hit by the baseball and time freezes as she hears Hugtan’s voice crying out. I was going to move its entry to later in the episode, in the scene where Hana stands on her balcony and talks about her future… but I relented because I honestly couldn’t bear to wipe Hana from existence right after her inspiring “You can be anything! You can do anything!” speech. I may be cruel and sadistic to the characters I love, but even I’m not totally heartless… much as my reputation may suggest the contrary.
  • Speaking of relenting: Yuko/Cure Honey was going to die right after she woke up in Chapter 37. The damage the Merry-Go-Round inflicted on her was going to be fatal, as part of the original plan to make Chapter 37 as bleak as I could. After talking it over with VDrake, I realized that Yuko dying would take away from the gravitas of losing Alph a few scenes later… and I was already concerned about the chapter being too dark, which led to me moving up the birth of the Umino’s baby. So I had Yuko survive, albeit badly injured and without her Cure powers.
  • And finally, there were many, many names I considered for the Lightouse faction before I chose “the Morning Lights”. I mentioned to a few people that I had a devil of a time thinking of something that was as effective and elegant as “Dead End”. The list of rejected names is below, copied directly from my 70-plus(!!!) pages of notes. The last one on the list was almost finalized, to the point where I had an updated version of the cover with that name finished and ready to upload… but ultimately I decided that I needed something more hopeful and less fatalistic. So here’s what almost was…

    Children of the Stars

    Children of Cosmos

    Children of the Lighthouse

    Alpha Dogs

    Alpha Wolves

    Toudai-gun (Japanese for “Lighthouse army”)

    Toudai-dan (“Lighthouse brigade”)

    Toudaimori (“Lighthouse keeper[s]”)

    [Dai]Goten-gun (“[Great] five star army”)

    [Dai]Goten-dan (“[Great] five star brigade”)

    Lumos

    Army of Solace

    Stellar Solace

    Hearts of the Stars

    Solace of the Stars

    Daybreak

    Signal [Beam]

    The Crossroads

    TsuKiMiTaKa (“Look at the moon,” from Tsukino, Kinomoto, Misumi, Takamachi, and Kaname)

    Last Lights

Whew! I don’t know how much of thatif any of itwas of interest to you guys, but you got a peek inside my thought process, at least.
Now then. This week saw the publication of Chapter 2 of Uravity Falls, which turned out quite nicely, I think. My next item of business is to get Chapter 5 of Twilight’s Dreaming done… I’m also trying to get back into streaming with The Messenger, in preparation for the launch of My Hero One’s Justice on the 26th. Busy busy busy.
– BHS

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: BHS Blogress Report: 2018, Week 41 – Downs and Ups | Tasakeru
  2. Trackback: BHS Blogress Report: 2018, Week 43 – Star☆Twinkle! | Tasakeru

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Tasakeru, tasakeru.com, and all related contents, text, and media are the Intellectual Property (IP) of BHS and BHS Productions, registered in 2009, and may not be modified, reproduced, or changed in any way, shape, or form without the author's express permission. For more information on usage rights, see the From the Author page.

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